What do you do when you do not know what to do 2…

We all have times/moments in life when it looks like everything is against us. It looks like we are not where we should be or things are not quite working as we expect.

Sometimes we feel we are not where we want to be despite having tried all. To continue in this line of thought only leads to discouragement and despair.

At such times, when we feel we do not know what to do next, we need to re-evaluate the situation(s). And to help do this effectively, we need to see the situation through the eyes of gratitude

Gratitude

A lot has been said about being grateful. It can not be over flogged. I have discovered that this gratitude thing has got to be personal i.e. it is not a duty or a mechanical event. Sit down, take a sheet of paper and pen and begin to list things you are grateful for example:

  • You are alive
  • You are not in the hospital
  • You have eyes to read this
  • You have hands to type
  • You have opportunity to access the internet
  • You have 10 fingers
  • You have 10 toes
  • You are not bed ridden
  • Things are bad but not everything is bad

Recently, my wife and I decided to take stock, we took a sheet of paper and divided it into two. We listed the good things on the left and the bad ones on the right. As we started listing all we could remember, it became apparent that the challenge is predominantly in only one area.

The exercise helped us to know that our challenges are in only one area and all the other things are working fine. So we were able to give thanks.

The exercise is such that no one can do it on your behalf but you have got to step back and consciously remember the things in your life that are working.

If we forget our problems the way we forget our blessings, life will be great.

It is amazing how when we focus on the positive, we see a light …The more grateful we are, for the things that have worked, that are working, the easier it is for us to move forward. Also, it is as if the exercise turns the light on and you suddenly begin to see things from a different light.

When you do not know what to do and you are feeling down and dejected, switch over consciously to the positive side by being grateful and you will be amazed how things turn around.

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He Raised Me Up

He killeth and maketh alive
He bringeth down to the grave and bringeth up
He maketh poor and maketh rich
He bringeth low and lifteth up
He raiseth up the poor out of the dust
He lifteth up the beggar from the dunghill

He forgiveth all thine iniquities
He healeth all thy diseases
He redeemeth thy life from destruction
He crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies
He satisfieth thy mouth with good things; so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

Have you not been paying attention?
Have you not been listening?
Haven’t you heard these stories all your life?
Don’t you understand the foundation of all things?
He sits high above the round ball of earth
The people look like mere ants
He stretches out the skies like a curtain

Who do you think made all these?
He marches this army of stars out each night
He counts them off, calls each by name

Why would you ever complain?
Don’t you know anything?
Haven’t you been listening?
He doesn’t come and go
He lasts
He’s Creator of all you can see or imagine
He doesn’t get tired out, doesn’t pause to catch his breath
He knows everything, inside and out
He energizes those who get tired
He gives fresh strength to dropouts

He opens and no man can shut
He shuts and no man can open
He is ALL

…on your way to where you are going

When I was less than 10, I used to envy my uncles, aunts and siblings. It looked like they had it all; at least they could afford to buy me biscuits, “suya” (Nigerian barbeque), drinks, and take me out. It was a good time whenever my elder brother came home.

How I wished I was all grown up like them so I could also have what they had. I loved the fact that they drove, went out without mom or dad being with them, and I liked the freedom they had.

I could not wait to get out of primary school and into secondary school and even when I got into secondary school, my eyes were on moving on to the University. It was not any different in the university as my eyes were on life after university.

This showed me that we are usually in a hurry; we want to move from our present phase to the next one…the grass always seems to be greener on the other side and we usually forget to enjoy the green on our side of the fence.

In our bid and longing for the next this, and the next that, we sometimes fail to enjoy the present. This message is for everyone who fails to pause and savour the pleasure of the moment, those who feel there is nothing to hope for or live for, and those who believe that their situation is the worst.

I discovered that when you live your life as described above, you seem to be less grateful, and feel miserable that you don’t have this or don’t have that – forgetting to count your blessings. You seem oblivious of what is working in your life and are more conscious of what seems not to be working.

If you find yourself trapped in the chain of “only the next this and the next that”, learn to take a break and savour the moment…Like Joyce Meyer said; “Enjoy where you are on the way to where you are going”. Life is a journey, so take it in your stride – this is not to say you should be complacent, but to enjoy the experience along the way.

Pause and enjoy where you are and what is working in your life. All cannot, and will never be bad at the same time; there must be something working, good, enjoyable, etc. about your present state. The challenges and difficulties of today will pass away at some point, what will they leave you with? Will you be bitter or better?

I wish I hadn’t focused more on what I did not have and things that were out of my reach, but instead focused more on what I did have at the time!

Now that I have some of the things I once longed for, sometimes I secretly wish for those other days and times when I was not responsible for the bills or anything, but just woke up, ate and slept…those times are gone and there is nothing I can do about them. No point wishing I had enjoyed those days more than I did as it does not change anything!

All I have is today and tomorrow and I have got to make the best use of my NOW.

When I realised this concept, I decided I was going to enjoy where I am now, on the way to where I am going. I am still working on myself but felt like sharing this story so we could all learn to enjoy our lives.

I’ll leave you with this quote from Sam Adeyemi: “When you have what you want, will you want what you have?”